28th JUNE - MY BIRTHDAY

Its always exciting to wait for my birthday, days before it actually comes . That one special day ..when everybody wishes me...mom does'nt scold..everybody wants to know whats happening in my life..every single person around me tries to make me feel special.
 
I feel like living my whole life in this particular day..but actually it does'nt happen. Time passes by and so does the hysteria. People keep calling in and I jot down the name of the people who wish me "happy birthday",there are so many of them. But as time passes ,the number of people start getting meagre.
 
Gifts !!! The best part of my birthday is this one. There is a sort of curiosity attached with them. The mere thought invigorates my mind. One of my greatest wish is to sit around thousands of gifts ,all by myself. Opening the well decorated gift wraps ,just like a 4-year old does.
 
I always give parties to people around me, a bit differently. On the day of my birthday, its just the family members and then on some other date its my friends who get this birthday party. (They feel its incumbent to do it!!!!)
 
Right from my childhood , my birthday always falls in holidays , that is, summer vacations in school and semester break in college. This fact has its own advantages and disadvantages. I can protect myself from the diabolic birthday bumps often given in a bad taste. But, I really miss my school and college friends.
 
Now, the biggest fact is as one becomes old this birthday affair and everything attached to it which was ebullient before dwindles down to a morsel.
 
When everybody has left,and its 11'o' clock in the night...when I am all by myself..in solitude..alone in my room, there's a quick recap of the day. I try to remember each and every detail of my birthday and the events that happened the same day. This is the point of time, where I remember the people who did'nt wish me "Happy Birthday !!!!". I start feeling maybe I am not important to them. Then, I recollect how I've been to them and did I wish them ?????
 
Its just me and my thoughts, and thoughts vacillating between pleasure moments and painful moments of my life. I become nostalgic, dredging up past moments. Wrongs that I've done to people around me or when I've been wronged by them, everything just flashes up !!!!!  I try to cry, but the tears dont come !!! And believe me, you really can't fight the tears that are'nt coming. My parents, my family, my life, my happiness, my love, my friends; there are just so many things i owe to...i fear hurting them..i fear losing them..i fear living without them..i fear living upto their expectations, these thoughts become too stodgy for me.
 
These smouldering thoughts keep me awake throughout the night. Dreams turn into smithereens. All my foibles seem like a flaw in the spectrum of my character. I search for a panacea and all I get is the "Valium". Life which was seeming on the crest of a wave few hours back circumscribes into a fiasco.
 
"Mom, give me my breakfast, I'm really getting late", I yelled. Driving my car, I just try to recollect what happened yersterday..and all that comes into my mind is that I really got great 'presents'. I listen to radio and this is the first line i hear from it, " Man is a moral zombie, he needs to cling on to his dreams, because the ramifications of life are really confusing." I wondered it was for me. And , I switched it off without a second thought. I gave an ecstatic smile, overtook the fastest car on the road and was back in my sedentary life.
 
But sometimes , I don't know why, I can feel the reverberations of a din.......[ :):) ]

THE POLITICAL FIASCO

Where's the silver lining ,you keep showing
Where's the silver lining ,I can't see..

Stellar politicians and the political incense,
Yet ,bragging about progress does'nt make sense..

One end of a boat sinking into the water ,
With people hailing in gloom..
The other end up in the air,
With people expecting an utopian boom..

"Thank God !! The hole is not on our side",
Says the illusionary priveleged man,

But the boat is here to vanish,
Its high time we understand..

Hey you rich people,
Keep your opulent gates closed..
There's poverty all around,
One day they will be stoned..

Educate your children and educate them well,
But don't forget there are millions in hell..

Where's the silver lining , You keep showing,
Where's the silver lining ,I cant see..

You talk about GDP ,the overall success meter,
But have you seen a car with one indicator...
There's speed ,fuel and engine heat,
That one indicator can't meet...

Master the donkeys with 'carrots and sticks',
To sapiens dont show these tricks...

They will jolt you out of the equilibrium one day,
Grab your throne and throw you away...

Here's the silver lining ,you can't see,
Here's the silver lining ,I can see.
Here's the silver lining ,I can see.

A REALISATION BEYOND IMAGINATION !!!!!

I slapped the snooze alarm for the third time and finally opened my eyes only to find myself in my hostel room. Last night had been a late one. I don’t remember how it first struck my mind but I got a deep insight when a number of instances around me...started coming up. I frantically thought about such instances and came across several real-life experiences that can just make you feel delighted. You might have not thought about it but you can always experience around you.

            “LOVE” ,the meaning is so deep, intense and touching that its truly undefined. Then there’s other side, there’s no meaning of true love, if you look for a meaning then its not LOVE infact.. So, that makes me perplexed…whether to look out for a meaning or not. I gave up all these thoughts and this is what I thought after that :-

• A smiling baby and her mother – the true definition of love. So pure!!! So unblemished !!! So true!!! The motive of each kind of love should be to reach this level of purity.
• When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather did it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That's love.
• Love is what makes you smile when you're tired.
• Love is when my mummy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK
• Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday.
• In my class 6th,during one of my class presentations ,I was on the stage and scared. Among all the people sitting, I could only see my father waving and smiling at me. He was the only one doing that , I was not scared anymore..
• Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day.
• An author and lecturer once talked about a contest he was asked to judge. The purpose of the contest was to find the most caring child. The winner was a 4 year old child whose next door neighbor was an elderly gentleman who had recently lost his wife.               Upon seeing the man cry, the little boy went into the old gentleman's yard, climbed onto his lap, and just sat there. When his Mother asked him what he had said to the neighbor, the little boy said, "Nothing, I just helped him cry."

Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. Love does not demand its own way. Love is not irritable, and it does not keep record of when it has been wronged. It is never glad about injustice but rejoices when truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through all circumstances. Love will last forever.

I went through a divine realisation that night..love is “An Elixir of LIFE” is what I ended up with.. We have lost ourselves to the materialistic world. Money,fame,power is all we thrive for but have we ever realised the true essence of life?? The obvious answer is “NO”.

FIND YOURSELF !!!!!

                         Sometimes , it is just one of those days when you don’t feel great about yourself. In an introspective mood ,the ambitious spirit inside you starts to combat with the sluggish part of you. Things get worse , when you lack in ideas or when you have tasted failure in recent times .The future prospects seem to be fuzzy and you lie crumpled in your chamber of questions ,dejected at the lack of solution. The path of true happiness and roaring success begins to get darker and darker.
                         
                         Some very helpful and handy tips that might just help you come out of this imbroglio :

1.Avoid Procrastination: Its one of the biggest and worst causes of stress in our lives . Not doing things till the last minute ,makes us lose a lot of precious time and opportunities. Although we may not think about it, but this ‘taalte raho’ attitude nags us at a subconscious level.
Set realistic goals .
Concentrate and finally keep a list of ‘things to do today’
Trust me , the feeling after completion of each day’s work is more rewarding and satiating than you can imagine.

2.Be a integrative planner:
Work out exactly what you want to achieve or  accomplish.
Set milestones for yourselves(short term goals) because seeing yourself achieve them will raise your confidence.
Focus on the process than on the results .But remember, you can have the best plans in the world and be totally right about your strategy but if you don’t engage in it and motivate yourself to work on it ,you will probably fail.

3.Rebuild your emotional intelligence:
Be flexible. Adapt quickly to the changing world .
Include humour and laughter in your life.
Develop an attitude of optimism.
Express your emotions. Don’t keep it bottled inside.
Lastly, love yourself and others .Appreciate others for good work that they do.

4.Reward yourself in your own style:“Work hard ,party harder”. It brings a lot of  positive vibes in your life. And there is always a driving force in anything you do.

5.Conquering your fears: Fear is good if one can use it properly and not be paralyzed by it. Its no use looking up to heaven with too much faith and too little struggle. Life is generous to those who pursue their destiny without any fear . People are not prisoners of fate but their own minds. The tragedy of life is not death but, what we let die within us, while we live .Pain and suffering are inevitable but being miserable is optional .

                                  Hope, these small little suggestions help you find yourself and your goals .And remember , the strongest people are not always the people who win, but the people who don’t give up when they lose.

A sterling pleasure!!!

                                                  
                                          I am tired of reading depressing front page news –of corrupt politicians and racism. Some part of country facing drought and other’s facing floods. Of helpless senior citizens being murdered in their homes and children fighting over college admissions.
                                         

                                          I am tired of the daily grind. All of us pushing and shoving to reach the finishing line in this rat race of life. Semesters passing by and so the college life. Scowling into computer screens . I need a break from it all. I think we all do.
                                         

                                          I make a list of some very tiny stuffs that bring joy…maybe for an instant though. Some ravishing things you would love to do. For the next few minutes, forget those big dreams you are chasing. Let’s unearth the hedonism in you. Let’s revel instead, in some small moments that bring us joy. Here are they(with no particular order):

• Listening to the beautiful melody of the flute seller on Sunday mornings.
• Eating a chocolate at anytime you feel(only if you are not dieting)- rain or shine, day or night, happy or sad.
• Buying flowers for no reasons at all.
• Watching the unabandoned , dancing of street children when a wedding procession goes by.
• Singing along loudly to any of your favourite song, while your headphones on.
• Babies-their smell, their smile, their yawn, their toes.
• A soft pillow and a freshly laundered bed sheet.
• Watching an elderly couple having a stroll down the moonlight.
• Finding a forgotten 100 rupee note in your back pocket. 
• Giving a beggar something very good to eat.
• Passing a smile to a stranger and receiving back the same.

                                               Small acts of kindness can actually make you feel like a good person. We all smile in the same language. It costs us nothing. Sometimes, we get so tired of our life’s burdens that we forget how a good smile feels. So, lift your spirits up and find something small that makes you happy . And SMILE.